A Tail of Two Cats

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Instruction manual.png
This quest has a quick guide found here.
It briefly summarises the steps needed to complete the quest.

Details[edit | edit source]

Walkthrough[edit | edit source]

Cat hunt[edit | edit source]

Items required: a cat or kitten, 5 death runes, a catspeak amulet

Recommended: a Varrock teleport

You do not need to have your kitten or cat following the entire time—simply keep it in your inventory throughout the quest, and it will jump out to participate in necessary dialogue, and then you can pick it back up again to avoid it becoming overgrown. Equip your catspeak amulet, and start the quest by talking to Unferth, who can be found in east Burthorpe in the house south of Dunstan. After starting, talk to Hild in the nearby house north-east of Unferth. She will enchant your catspeak amulet if you give her five death runes. You can now open it to find Bob's location. It works somewhat like a compass - when facing north, click the left or right whiskers to control the interface and point it in the right direction. When you see the central cat's eyes light up, go in that direction to find Bob. He can be anywhere in RuneScape. However it is recommended to pick a common spot where Bob is found, and then world hop. He is commonly found at the Varrock anvils (south of the Varrock west bank, not the armour shop anvils).

List of locations:

The interface of the Amulet of catspeak (e). This specific picture shows that Bob is south-east to the player's current location.

Strong lineage[edit | edit source]

After finding Bob, talk to him. He will tell you that he's in love with Neite, but she has no idea what his origins are so she's not interested in him. Talk to Gertrude (located south of the Cooking Guild, West of Varrock) about Bob's family. While there, your cat will tell you to research a warrior called Robert the Strong.

In the Varrock Palace library, talk to Reldo. He will tell you that Robert the Strong was much taller and stronger than any other man of his time. His longbow was six feet tall, and he fought immortal monsters known as the Dragonkin. He fought alongside a black panther.

Return to Bob (who might have changed location, use the enchanted Catspeak amulet to locate him). You and your cat will try to convince Bob he is Robert the Strong. Your cat will remind you of the fact that the Sphinx knows how you were hypnotised, so perhaps it can hypnotise Bob.

Hidden memories[edit | edit source]

The Sphinx talking to Bob the cat in the desert.

Recommended items: Nardah teleport AND coins for the magic carpets OR Desert clothing AND waterskins
Additionally you will need a games necklace if you decide to skip the cutscene

Talk to the Sphinx in Sophanem. A good way of getting there is to take a magic carpet to Pollnivneach from Shantay Pass and then to Sophanem using Pollnivneach's southern carpet - the Sphinx is south-east of the northern pyramid. Ask her for help, and after a bit, you'll have the option to view a five-minute cutscene or get a brief summary of what happens. If you choose the brief summary, you won't be offered the option of being teleported to Burthorpe.

During the cutscene, the Sphinx will teleport Bob to Sophanem and hypnotise him. Bob, thinking back on his earliest memories, recalls himself as Robert the Strong. He sees himself looking over at a tower beside Odysseus, followed by a battle between them and a dragonkin; the dragonkin manages to slay the panther and weaken Robert, but is killed by an immensely powerful attack by him.

After the cutscene, the Sphinx teleports Neite to Bob, who will be impressed and fall in love with him. Bob will tell you to keep his owner busy by doing his chores, and you will be given the option to teleport back to Burthorpe, or stay in Sophanem.

Bob's list[edit | edit source]

Items required: Catspeak amulet (wear it), A vial of water, logs, a tinderbox, a bucket of milk, a chocolate cake, shears, a rake, a seed dibber, 4 potato seeds

Recommended items: Varrock teleports, a games necklace

Go back to Unferth's house in Burthorpe and do these chores:

One of the chores Bob asks you to do while he is gone.
  • Tidy house: Make Unferth's bed. This takes one click and is the easiest chore.
  • Warm human: Use some logs on the fireplace and light it.
  • Feed human: Use a bucket of milk and a chocolate cake on the table. Right click your cake! Do not eat it. A slice of cake does not work. Make sure it is the table with a cup and plate on it, NOT the one next to his bed.
  • Tidy human: Use a pair of shears on Unferth to shave his hair. Note: The animation takes a couple of seconds, do not click away until he is bald.
  • Tend garden: Using your rake, weed Unferth's patch in the yard just north of the house and plant four potato seeds. You now need to wait about 25 – 35 minutes for them to grow. You do not need to water the patch. If this is the only remaining chore, you will be alerted by your character or your cat/kitten saying all the chores are finished.

After you've done all of this, talk to Unferth again. He'll tell you that he's very ill and must see a doctor or a nurse. Talk to the Apothecary in Varrock (located in the south-west of the city). He will tell you that Unferth is a hypochondriac - he thinks that he's sick all the time even though he really has been tested for illnesses and it's all in his head. You need to use a placebo on him - pick a doctors hat or nurse hat from the Apothecary, and wear some white robes (princess robes and graceful outfit don't work).

Go back to Unferth's house, and give him a vial of water. His illness will clear up. Note: You can't be wielding a weapon/shield; otherwise, Unferth won't believe you.

Love-cats[edit | edit source]

Using your catspeak amulet, find Bob again and talk to him. He may have moved to another of the other locations mentioned above, or even in the same location as before. You'll see a cutscene showing all the adventures Bob takes Neite on, including a magic carpet ride in Sophanem, a conversation between Bob and the King Black Dragon (a player spoof known as R4ng3rNo0b889 also tries to attack the dragon, but the dragon kills him instantly), and a journey on the Fishing Trawler ship.

After the cutscene, you will be teleported in front of Unferth's house. Talk to him to get a present from Bob, finishing the quest.

Rewards[edit | edit source]

A Tail of Two Cats reward scroll.png

Required for completing[edit | edit source]

Changes[edit | edit source]

Date Changes
9 May 2013
(update)
A cutscene in A Tail of Two Cats has been fixed.

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • The quest had a scrapped cutscene which included Bob and Neite's wedding (with Neite wearing a wedding veil and Bob wearing a white bow tie), as well as several other unused NPCs, such as their son Beite, two gnomes (with one wielding a Daguerreotype camera) and Odysseus' ghost. As the developer of the quest resigned before finishing it, the cutscene was never developed[1], but the NPCs remained in the game code.
  • If you have completed Dragon Slayer II, upon telling Juna a story about this quest, Juna will respond with dialogue related to the events of Dragon Slayer II. This is unique in that Dragon Slayer II is the only quest that Juna has two lines of dialogue for, and this is her only dialogue that pertains to two quests that are independent of each other.
  • The name of the quest "A Tail of Two Cats" is a reference to the Charles Dickens novel "A Tale of Two Cities".
  • When you first speak to Bob he says "Love looks not with the eyes but with the mind. And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind." This line is spoken by Helena to Lysander in Shakespeare's "A Midsummer's Night Dream."
  • One of the scenes in the second cutscene shows a spoof scene of the film Titanic, Bob is standing on the bow of the ship and says: "I'm king of Gielinor".
  • You can find a recipe for chocolate cake if you search the bookcase while doing the chores in Unferth's house.
  • During the cutscene with the Sphinx, Bob says "Hey, I'm just this cat, you know." This is likely a reference to the character Gag Halfrunt in Douglas Adams' The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Additionally, during the initial dialogue with Unferth, the player comments how strange it is that Bob usually returns every Thursday before lunchtime; Adams' lead character, Arthur Dent, "never could quite get the hang of Thursdays," and the series begins on a Thursday before lunchtime.
  • Upon examining the potato plants in Unferth's house, it says "You say Potato, I say Poh-tar-to". This is a reference to a 1937 film Shall We Dance.
  • If you talk to Bob after having completed the chores but before talking to Unferth then Bob and your cat will do a spoof of the Star Wars scene when Luke finds out that Darth Vader is his father.

References[edit | edit source]

  1. Jagex. Mod Ash's Twitter account. 25 January 2019. Mod Ash: "I don't believe the dev ever wrote any code for that. He resigned before the quest was completed, and the rest of us shepherded it through the end of testing and launch. It's a shame - he was a clever programmer."