Transcript of Cook's Assistant

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This transcript involves dialogue with Cook (Lumbridge) and the player.

Talking to the Cook[edit | edit source]

  • Cook: What am I to do?
  • What's wrong?
    • Player: What's wrong?
    • Cook: Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, I'm in a terrible terrible mess! It's the Duke's birthday today, and I should be making him a lovely big birthday cake.
    • Cook: I've forgotten to buy the ingredients. I'll never get them in time now. He'll sack me! What will I do? I have four children and a goat to look after. Would you help me? Please?
    • Start the Cook's Assistant quest?
    • Yes.
      • Player: Yes, I'll help you.
      • Cook: Oh thank you, thank you. I need milk, an egg and flour. I'd be very grateful if you can get them for me.
      • If the player already has the necessary items:
        • Player: I have all of those ingredients on me already!
        • Cook: That's an odd coincidence... Were you planning on making a cake too?
        • Player: Not exactly. I just had an odd feeling you might be needing these ingredients. If I see a cook, I presume there's food of some kind! Lucky guess I suppose.
        • Cook: Well thank you! Hand them over, please.
        • Cook: You've brought me everything I need! I am saved! Thank you!
        • Player: So do I get to go to the Duke's Party?
        • Cook: I'm afraid not, only the big cheeses get to dine with the Duke.
        • Player: Well, maybe one day I'll be important enough to sit on the Duke's table.
        • Cook: Maybe, but I won't be holding my breath.
        • (End of dialogue)
      • If the player doesn't have the necessary items:
        • Player: So where do I find these ingredients then?
        • Where do I find some flour?
          • Cook: There is a Mill fairly close, go North and then West. Mill Lane Mill is just off the road to Draynor. I usually get my flour from there.
          • If the player has an empty pot with them:
            • Cook: Talk to Millie, she'll help, she's a lovely girl and a fine Miller. Make sure you take a pot with you for the flour though, you've got one on you already.
            • (Shows other options)
          • If the player does not have an empty pot with them:
            • Cook: Talk to Millie, she'll help, she's a lovely girl and a fine Miller. Make sure you take a pot with you for the flour though, there should be one on the table in here.
            • (Shows other options)
        • How about milk?
          • Cook: There is a cattle field on the other side of the river, just across the road from the Groats' Farm.
          • Cook: Talk to Gillie Groats, she looks after the Dairy cows - she'll tell you everything you need to know about milking cows!
          • If the player has an empty bucket with them:
            • Cook: You'll need an empty bucket for the milk itself. I do see you've got a bucket with you already luckily!
            • (Shows other options)
          • If the player does not have an empty bucket with them:
            • Cook: You'll need an empty bucket for the milk itself. The general store just north of the castle will sell you one for a couple of coins.
            • (Shows other options)
        • And eggs? Where are they found?
          • Cook: I normally get my eggs from the Groats' farm, on the other side of the river.
          • Cook: But any chicken should lay eggs.
          • Where do I find some flour?
            • (Same as above)
          • How about milk?
            • (Same as above)
          • And eggs? Where are they found?
            • (Same as above)
          • I've got all the information I need. Thanks.
            • Player: I've got all the information I need. Thanks.
            • (End of dialogue)
        • Actually, I know where to find this stuff.
          • Player: Actually, I know where to find this stuff.
          • (End of dialogue)
    • No.
      • Player: No, I don't feel like it. Maybe later.
      • Cook: Fine. I always knew you Adventurer types were callous beasts. Go on your merry way!
      • (End of dialogue)
  • Can you make me a cake?
    • Player: You're a cook, why don't you bake me a cake?
    • Cook: *sniff* Don't talk to me about cakes...
    • Player: What's wrong?
    • (Same as above)
  • You don't look very happy.
    • Player: You don't look very happy.
    • Cook: No, I'm not. The world is caving in around me - I am overcome by dark feelings of impending doom.
    • What's wrong?
      • (Same as above)
    • I'd take the rest of the day off if I were you.
      • Player: I'd take the rest of the day off if I were you.
      • Cook: No, that's the worst thing I could do. I'd get in terrible trouble.
      • Player: Well maybe you need to take a holiday...
      • Cook: That would be nice, but the Duke doesn't allow holidays for core staff.
      • Player: Hmm, why not run away to the sea and start a new life as a Pirate?
      • Cook: My wife gets sea sick, and I have an irrational fear of eyepatches. I don't see it working myself.
      • Player: I'm afraid I've run out of ideas.
      • Cook: I know I'm doomed.
      • Player: What's wrong?
      • (Same as above)
  • Nice hat!
    • Player: Nice hat!
    • Cook: Err thank you. It's a pretty ordinary cooks hat really.
    • Player: Still, suits you. The trousers are pretty special too.
    • Cook: Its all standard cook's issue uniform...
    • Player: The whole hat, apron, stripey trousers ensemble - it works. It makes you look like a real cook.
    • Cook: I am a real cook! I haven't got time to be chatting about Culinary Fashion. I am in desperate need of help!
    • Player: What's wrong?
    • (Same as above)

Talking to the Cook again[edit | edit source]

  • Cook: How are you getting on with finding the ingredients?
  • If the player has not obtained anything yet:
    • Player: I haven't got any of them yet, I'm still looking.
    • Cook: Please get the ingredients quickly - I'm running out of time! The Duke will throw me into the streets!
    • If the player hasn't handed in at least one item. Items are removed from the list when handed in:
    • You still need to get: A bucket of milk A pot of flour An egg
    • I'll get right on it.
      • (End of dialogue)
    • Can you remind me how to find these things again?
      • Player: So where do I find these ingredients then?
      • (Same as above)
  • If the player has the ingredients:
    • Player: Here's a bucket of milk.
    • Player: Here's a pot of flour.
    • Player: Here's a fresh egg.
    • If the player has not brought all the ingredients:
      • Cook: Thanks for ingredients you have got so far, please get the rest quickly - I'm running out of time! The Duke will throw me into the streets!
      • (Shows other options)
    • If the player has brought all the ingredients:
      • Cook: You've brought me everything I need! I am saved! Thank you!
      • Player: So do I get to go to the Duke's Party?
      • Cook: I'm afraid not, only the big cheeses get to dine with the Duke.
      • Player: Well, maybe one day I'll be important enough to sit on the Duke's table.
      • Cook: Maybe, but I won't be holding my breath.
      • (End of dialogue)