Transcript of The living statues
The war between the gods has taken its toll on all of us, but especially on my kind, the Dorgeshuun. We were not made to fight, we are a peaceful race. We were forced into fighting for the god Bandos, or as I like to call him, the Big High Idiot.
Normally I would have to hold back regurgitating my dinner every time I recount my experiences. However, there was this one occurrence that I thought would make for quite the story to tell.
The Big High Idiot wanted the war to go on for eternity, but all the goblins, including me, were too squishy for his needs. He wanted some new foot soldiers that could take a harder beating and deliver it as well. He could probably have created these soldiers shimself, but he was too busy throwing punches with Armadyl, so he decided to appoint some lackeys for the job. Unfortunately, that included me.
I was sent on a mission to assist the Ourg general Snaarldor in creating a new weapon, which roughly translates to lugging around the baggage for him.
Snaarldor carried a large hunk of tourmaline with him, shaped like a heart. I mused that it was a representation of Bandos’ stone, blackened heart, but I dare not say it in earshot of one of his most loyal commanders. I wasn’t sure what it was for, but apparently it had some kind of reaction when it came into contact with the metal that the Big High idiot created. We were supposed to use it to create some kind of device and perform a ritual around it. I didn’t know what the end goal would be, but I was the one who was supposed to perform the ritual.
Somehow, our trek ended up leading us past the River Salve and into Hallowvale, the land of Saradomin. I expressed my concern to Snaarldor, but he just threatened to give me something else to be concerned about. I supposed we were fortunate, or unfortunate for me, that the forces of Zamorak were laying siege to Hallowvale.
We marched northwards until we stumbled upon a tall tower made of granite. I knew what it was. We had found Viggora’s Folly, left to collect dust since his demise.
Snaarldor took interest and had his force go inside. The massive doors gave plenty of spare room for Snaarldor to go through, and the tall wide halls really did make the massive oaf feel right at home. Our curiosity on the size of everything was cut short when we noticed what decorated these halls. There were monstrous statues of some creature that I doubt existed in Gielinor or any other realm.
We kept marching up the floors until we arrived on the windswept rooftop. Inhabiting it were two massive statues of whatever they were supposed to be. One look at them, and Snaarldor decided that he would bring these sculptures to life. I had no idea how that was going to happen, but Snaarldor had me and the other goblins set up the incantation circle, along with stakes made of Bandos’ metal.
Once we set that up, we had to wait for high noon. As we waited for the sun to be directly over us, I couldn’t help but notice that the two statues we intended to bring to life were situated to the east and west. I thought to myself that Dusk and Dawn would have been fitting names for them, one in the direction of the rising sun, and the other in the direction of the setting sun. I didn’t have long to dwell on that thought, however, as the light in the sky loomed ever closer to the position we needed.
The gleam of the tourmaline started to reflect towards both the statues. It’s amazing how something so dark can be so bright. I didn’t have much time to admire it once Snaarldor began the ritual.
He placed his palms onto the circle, causing them to light up. The tourmaline core slowly sank into the granite floor as if it were liquid. Once it was fully submerged, we prepared for the final step.
The bell was struck, its chimes echoing throughout the tower. A surge of black energy pulsed from the bell, permeating throughout the tall halls. Once the blast settled down, the effects were immediate. I heard some grinding sounds as if two stones were being rubbed together. I turned my attention to the two statues, and by the gods, they were moving. Slowly, they descended from their podiums onto the roof, then stood still.
Ecstatic with his creation, Snaarldor gave a big speech about the glory of the Big High War God and such, as if he expected some lumps of carved rock to understand a single thing. After that, Snaarldor gave commands to fight against the forces of Armadyl, Saradomin, and Zamorak.
The guardians turned their head at the lattermost name. Snaarldor thought this meant he had gained their loyalty. However, I knew better than to think that. Viggora was a follower of Zamorak, and I knew the tower would be filled with his magic. I wanted to tell Snaarldor this, but once again he threatened me with a long list of what he would do to me.
Before he could finish his threat, he vanished from my line of sight in a blur, and the next second I was blown away from behind. I was sent tumbling until I was stopped by the wall. Once my head stopped spinning, I witnessed the statues attacking Snaarldor. The orks tried to beat them off their general, but they were simply swatted away by the stone wings.
Death was certain if I stayed in the tower, so I made a run for it. As I ran down the stairs through the lower floors, I saw that the many hideous statues we passed had also come to life. I managed to avoid all of the living stone monsters and made my way out of the tower.
As I was running for my life, a giant shadow passed over me. I looked up and saw the hulking bodies of Snaarldor and one of the statues exchanging strikes in mid air. Snaarldor landed a chop that broke off a wing, and they both fell. The statue landed back on top of the tower while Snaarldor made contact with the nearby swamp. After getting up from the fall, Snaarldor immediately called for his remaining forces to retreat.
There was no way I was going to go back to serving the Big High Idiot after what had happened, so once we crossed back over to the west, I made my escape. I don’t know what those great statues are doing now, but I’m glad to be well away from them.