Dialogue for Trainer Nacklepen

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Standard dialogue[edit | edit source]

  • Player: Who are you then?
  • Trainer Nacklepen: Hurumph.
  • Trainer Nacklepen: Nacklepen, tortoise trainer extraordinaire.
  • Player: What's extraordinary about you?
  • Trainer Nacklepen: Do you know any other tortoise trainers?
  • Player: Well, no.
  • Trainer Nacklepen: Well there you go then.
    • So what are you training these tortoises to do?
      • Trainer Nacklepen: Tortoises are naturally pacifistic animals that eat nothing but cabbages. I am required to beat those peaceful tendencies out of the softies and turn them into hardened battle-trained killers.
      • Trainer Nacklepen: Firstly I acclimatise them to excessive aural stimulation and simple physical confrontation.
      • Player: You shout at them and beat them with sticks?
      • Trainer Nacklepen: Of course. Then I re-educate them to become comfortable with riders and military combat situations.
      • Player: You sit on their backs and prod them with sharp pointy things.
      • Trainer Nacklepen: If you like.
      • Player: Doesn't seem very fair on the tortoises.
      • Trainer Nacklepen: This is War[sic]! Fairness is a luxury of the weak.
      • Player: Hmmm, profound but disturbing.
        • Why tortoises?
          • (Same as below)
        • Where did these tortoises come from?
          • (Same as below)
        • I've heard enough.
          • (Same as below)
    • Why tortoises?
      • Player: So why tortoises?
      • Trainer Nacklepen: Isn't it obvious? Surely even to your untrained eye that giant tortoises are the perfect mobile armoured field unit?
      • Trainer Nacklepen: They are sturdy animals, and well protected by their shell. They can even swim! All we need to do is put a bit of fire in their bellies.
      • Player: I suppose so....
        • So what are you training these tortoises to do?
          • (Same as above)
        • Where did these tortoises come from?
          • (Same as below)
        • I've heard enough.
          • (Same as below)
    • Where did these tortoises come from?
      • Player: Where do these tortoises come from?
      • Trainer Nacklepen: We breed them. The originals were found by gnome explorers back in King Healthorg the Great's rule. On their discovery King Healthorg authorised a small party to go there and transport a breeding pair back here. He
      • Trainer Nacklepen: kept one for himself to ride into battle.
      • Trainer Nacklepen: Trouble is they take a lot of skill and time to breed, so we're only just getting them battle ready.
        • So what are you training these tortoises to do?
          • (Same as above)
        • Why tortoises?
          • (Same as above)
        • I've heard enough.
          • (End of dialogue)