Transcript of Making Friends with My Arm

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This transcript involves dialogue with Burntmeat, Wolfbone, My Arm, Larry, Boulder, Squirrel (troll), Icicle, Pebble, Mother, Don't Know What, Odd Mushroom, Snowflake, Wise Old Man, Apothecary, Odd Stone, Butterfly (troll), Goat Poo, and the player.

Starting out[edit | edit source]

Talking to Burntmeat[edit | edit source]

  • Burntmeat: Always humans running through Burntmeat's kitchen these days. It never used to be like dis.
  • Player: Well, don't get any funny ideas! You promised you'd never cook another human if I helped My Arm grow goutweed.
  • Burntmeat: An' dat promise I is keeping! Never another human shall Burntmeat cook. Human taste plenty good raw if you add enough goutweed.
  • Player: ...
  • Burntmeat: Anyway, Burntmeat been hoping to see you again. Got important visitor here, an' we need your help.
  • Wolfbone: It good to meet you, [player name]. Burntmeat tells me you very helpful human.
  • Burntmeat: So, you ready for another quest, [player name]? You get good reward if you help us.
    • Will Burntmeat reward me with burnt meat again?
      • Player: Will Burntmeat reward me with burnt meat again? I've been here before, you know!
      • Burntmeat: Silly human pretends he/she not liking lovely burnt meat! But okay, Burntmeat promises not to give you more burnt meat.
        • Yes, I'll take your quest.
          • (Same as below)
        • Totally not interested.
          • (Same as below)
    • Yes, I'll take your quest.
      • Player: Yes, I'll take your quest.
      • Burntmeat: Good human! You not regret dis, Burntmeat is sure.
      • Player: So tell me about this quest.
      • Wolfbone: I come from troll town called Weiss, up in cold mountains to the north. We heard of trolls here, an' wanted to meet.
      • Wolfbone: Our chief, Mother, want to trade. Weiss trolls invented stuff maybe these trolls want. An' maybe these trolls invented stuff we want in Weiss.
      • Wolfbone: So Mother want these trolls to send ambassador up to Weiss, maybe teach us their inventions, an' in return I teach Weiss inventions here.
      • Player: So you're planning on sending someone to Weiss to teach them the technology invented by the Stronghold trolls?
      • Burntmeat: That correct! An' Burntmeat decided to send My Arm. He best troll to go to Weiss and teach stuff there. He already training assistant to take over goutweed farming.
        • Why in the heck would you choose My Arm?
          • Player: Why in the heck would you choose My Arm?
          • Burntmeat: My Arm is good choice! He been to distant lands, met strange people, come back with new learnings for Stronghold. He obviously best troll for dis job.
          • Player: Okay.
          • (Same as below)
        • Okay.
          • Player: Okay.
          • Burntmeat: Wolfbone come from Weiss over icy mountains, but you not go that route. It too hard for Stronghold trolls. We not practiced climbing icy mountains.
          • Wolfbone: That correct. You find boat and go to Weiss by sea instead. Wolfbone tell you the way...
          • Wolfbone describes how to reach Weiss by sea.
          • Burntmeat: Okieday, now you go fetch My Arm an' tell him where he got to go.
          • Player: Okay...
          • (End of dialogue)
    • Totally not interested.
      • (End of dialogue)

Talking to My Arm[edit | edit source]

  • My Arm: Hey, [player name].
    • How's your farming coming along?
      • Non-quest dialogue
    • I'm doing another quest for Burntmeat.
      • Player: I'm doing another quest for Burntmeat.
      • My Arm: Dat nice. Burntmeat always cook lovely burnt meat for you when you help us before.
      • Player: Yes, he did. Lots of burnt meat filling my inventory. That was Burntmeat's reward.
      • My Arm: What Burntmeat need from you dis time?
      • Player: There's a troll town called Weiss, up in the north. They want a troll from the Stronghold to go and teach them about the technology you've invented here.
      • My Arm: 'An Burntmeat choose My Arm to go? Dat sound like great honour! It make good sense, too - My Arm got all da goutweed knowledge.
      • My Arm: Stronghold trolls not really invented much else. We know bashing things with rocks make 'em dead, but maybe Weiss trolls know dat already.
      • My Arm: But dat not a problem, [player name]. My Arm know lots 'bout growing goutweed. It gonna be fine.
        • Don't you mind leaving your home?
          • Player: Don't you mind leaving your home?
          • My Arm: Eh... My Arm not mind. My Arm like seeing places, like dat jungle village where da nice people give us goutweed stuff.
          • Player: Those nice people might have given you anything you liked, if it would make you stop damaging their village.
          • My Arm: Anyway, My Arm not mind going to Weiss. No family here now, not since My Other Arm died. Got apprentice ready to take over goutweed farming. Dis gonna be fine.
          • Player: So My Arm very happy to go teach goutweed farming to trolls in Weiss. It so exciting!
            • Isn't there anything else you can teach them?
              • Player: Isn't there anything else you can teach them?
              • My Arm: Stronghold trolls not really invented much else. We know bashing things with rocks make 'em dead, but maybe Weiss trolls know dat already.
              • (Shows other options)
            • Wolfbone said we should go by sea.
              • (Same as above)
            • I'll be off.
              • (Same as above)
        • Wolfbone said we should go by sea.
          • Player: Wolfbone said we should go by sea. Apparently the mountains are too hard to cross, so he told me how to get there by sea.
          • My Arm: My Arm been on boat before, an' not like it. But My Arm not like crossing cold mountain either... eh, we better go by boat. You got a boat ready?
          • Player: I once helped a guy called Larry with some penguins; he's got a boat near here, west of the mountains, near Rellekka. Come and meet me there, and we'll try borrowing it.
          • My Arm: Okieday, My Arm know how to find it. It on coast near smelly fur-wearing human town you call Rellekka. See you in a bit.
          • (End of dialogue)
        • I'll be off.
          • Player: I'll be off.
          • My Arm: My Arm look forward to getting on with da job when you ready!
          • (End of dialogue)
    • About that farming book you had...
      • Non-quest dialogue
    • I'll be back.
      • Non-quest dialogue

Talking to My Arm again[edit | edit source]

  • My Arm: My Arm very excited 'bout going to Weiss to teach stuff to da trolls. Better hope dey like hearing 'bout goutweed.
    • Isn't there anything else you can teach them?
      • (Same as above)
    • Don't you mind leaving your home?
      • (Same as above)
    • Meet me at Larry's boat.
      • Player: Meet me at Larry's boat. I helped him rather a lot with those penguins, so hopefully he'll let us borrow it. It's west of the mountains, near Rellekka.
      • My Arm: My Arm know da place, it on coast near smelly fur- wearing human town you call Rellekka. See you in a bit.
      • (End of dialogue)

Talking to Larry[edit | edit source]

  • Larry: I can't speak right now. I have too much to do. I will contact you when the time is right.
    • I'd like to travel to the iceberg.
      • Non-quest dialogue
    • Can I transport My Arm in your boat?
      • Player: Can I transport My Arm in your boat?
      • Larry: Well, yes, I'm sure you've transported your arm every time you've used my boat. Isn't it always attached to the rest of your body?
        • My Arm is a troll.
          • Player: My Arm is a troll.
          • Larry: Your arm is... a troll? It's really not. I can see both of them. Sorry, have you had your brain shrunk into a penguin suit too many times?
          • Player: This kind of thing happens a lot when I take My Arm out to places.
          • Larry: You take your arm out to places? And what the heck is THAT?
          • My Arm arrives, frightening Larry.
          • My Arm: My Arm here!
          • (End of dialogue)
        • Never mind, I just need to borrow your boat.
          • Player: Never mind, I just need to borrow your boat.
          • Larry: Sorry, I distinctly heard you say you wanted to transport your arm in it. Have you had your brain shrunk into a penguin suit too many times? I don't lend my boat to mad people.
          • Player: This kind of thing happens a lot when I take My Arm out to places.
          • Larry: You take your arm out to places? And what the heck is THAT?
          • My Arm arrives, frightening Larry.
          • My Arm: My Arm here!
          • (End of dialogue)

Talking to Larry after My Arm arrives[edit | edit source]

  • Larry: I can't speak right now. I have too much to do. I will contact you when the time is right.
    • I'd like to travel to the iceberg.
      • Non-quest dialogue
    • Can I transport My Arm in your boat?
      • Player: Can I transport My Arm in your boat?
      • Larry: That thing is an arm?
      • My Arm: Dat 'thing' is a troll, an' My Arm not like being called a thing!
      • Player: This is My Arm, yes. We'd like to borrow your boat, so we can visit more trolls in the north. My Arm is going to teach them to farm.
      • My Arm: My Arm is a farmer, yup! Got a farm.
      • Larry: Your arm's arm has a farm... Please make this stop!
      • My Arm: Eh, [player name], My Arm thinks dis human kinda dumb. Can we use boat or not? My Arm getting bored.
      • Larry: You want my boat? Yes, yes, take my boat and go a very long way from me! And take your arm with you!
      • (End of dialogue)

Troll Diplomacy[edit | edit source]

Sailing to Weiss[edit | edit source]

  • You and My Arm sail to Weiss.
  • My Arm: Are we dere yet?
  • Player: No.
  • You and My Arm continue sailing to Weiss.
  • My Arm: Are we dere yet?
  • Player: No.
  • You and My Arm continue sailing to Weiss.
  • My Arm: You going too slow. Let My Arm drive!
  • Player: Um... well, let's see how this goes...
  • You and My Arm somehow sail backwards.
  • My Arm: Is we going backwards?
  • Player: Yes.
  • My Arm: My Arm didn't know boats could go backwards.
  • Player: Maybe I should drive again.
  • You and My Arm continue sailing to Weiss.
  • My Arm: You gettin' angry with My Arm again?
  • Player: No.
  • You and My Arm continue sailing to Weiss.
  • My Arm: Dis boat smell of bird poo.
  • Player: We didn't have many choices.
  • You and My Arm continue sailing to Weiss.
  • My Arm: So... are we dere yet?
  • Player: ...
  • You reach the coast near Weiss.
  • (End of dialogue)

Talking to My Arm[edit | edit source]

  • My Arm: Well, we here. My Arm not enjoyed boat ride. Weiss must be up top of cliff, but My Arm not gonna be able to climb up.
  • Player: Wolfbone said we should moor here and go up the cliffs.
  • Player: He might have assumed you're good at climbing, since you actually live on a mountain!
  • Player: Anyway, I'll have a look around.
  • (End of dialogue)

Attempting to climb rockslide[edit | edit source]

  • My Arm: My Arm not gonna be able to climb dat. Maybe you look for other way first?
  • (End of dialogue)

Attempting to mine cave entrance[edit | edit source]

  • My Arm: My Arm not gonna be able to get through dat hole. It got all rocks in da way. You wanna clear it?
  • Player: I can't see whether it's safe to clear the blockage from out here, or whether that would collapse the cave.
  • Player: Maybe if I got into the cave from above, I could clear it more safely from inside.

Upon climbing up all the rocks[edit | edit source]

  • Player: A cave! Maybe I can go down there, and find a way to mine through the blocked passage from the inside, to let My Arm in...
  • (End of dialogue)

Crossing the fence before talking to Boulder[edit | edit source]

  • Player: I'm supposed to be introducing My Arm to this town as their new friend. Maybe it'd be worth talking to the inhabitants before assuming I need to break into their home.
  • (End of dialogue)

Talking to Boulder[edit | edit source]

  • Boulder: What you want, human? You not coming in. Weiss is troll town - humans not welcome.
    • My Arm has come to make friends with you.
      • Player: My Arm has come to make friends with you.
      • Boulder: Boulder not sure exactly what you offering, human, but it not sound like something Boulder want to happen.
      • Player: But My Arm's come a very long way for this, and he's very excited about what he can teach you.
      • Boulder: Boulder still not sure what you offering, human, but you definitely not doing it in here. Go away!
      • (Shows other options)
    • Wolfbone's sent My Arm from the Troll Stronghold.
      • Player: Wolfbone's sent My Arm from the Troll Stronghold.
      • Boulder: Human arm might taste good, maybe, so if Wolfbone sent your arm as snack, we happy to take it an' eat it.
      • Player: I'm not letting you eat my arm.
      • Boulder: Urgh - human arm attached to human body with human mouth what keep talking an' talking. Shut up an' go away.
      • (Shows other options)
    • You only need to let My Arm in, not me.
      • Player: You only need to let My Arm in, not me.
      • Boulder: Human sound confused about how body work. See, mortal body is intrinsic part of mortal being. It not like we got our souls floating up in da sky controlling bodies like puppets.
      • Boulder: We mortal beings - troll, human, goat - we are our bodies, and our bodies are us. You human got dumb ideas 'bout mind/body dualism.
      • Boulder: Anyway, Boulder not here to talk ontological distinction between mind an' matter, especially with dumb human who not know what his arm is. So push off.
      • (Shows other options)
    • I'll be back!
      • Player: I'll be back!
      • Boulder: Maybe next time you come, Boulder get ear-plugs.
      • (End of dialogue)

Home Invasion[edit | edit source]

Descending hole after evading all the trolls[edit | edit source]

  • Squirrel: Human intruder!
  • Several trolls follow you into the caverns.
  • The trolls are coming - you'd better hide!
  • If players fail to hide in time:
    • Icicle: Got ya!
    • You're knocked unconscious and chucked out of Weiss.
    • (End of dialogue)
  • If players successfully hid in time:
    • Player: It's a good thing I got in here before those trolls arrived!
    • (End of dialogue)

Upon walking close enough to the cave exit[edit | edit source]

  • Player: Well, there's the cave exit I need to clear. Then My Arm can get into this cave.
  • Player: The Weiss trolls won't trust me until they can see I've really brought a troll here. But they won't be able to see My Arm unless he walks far enough into the cave.
  • Player: The water looks shallow at the north end. Maybe it can be filled up with rocks, or something, so My Arm could walk further into the cave...
  • Player: ... and those trolls seem to have plenty of rocks to throw into the water...
  • (End of dialogue)

Upon creating a long enough stepping stone path[edit | edit source]

  • Player: I reckon those stepping stones will let My Arm enter the cave far enough for the trolls to see him! I'd better clear that obstruction so he can get in.
  • (End of dialogue)

Upon clearing the obstruction[edit | edit source]

  • My Arm: T'anks, [player name].
  • My Arm uses the stepping stones to walk further.
  • Pebble: Stop chuckin' rocks - it a troll! Bring him to Mother!
  • (End of dialogue)

Meeting with Mother[edit | edit source]

  • Mother: Welcome to Weiss, troll. I am Mother. Mother sorry about your trouble getting in here.
  • Mother: We not trust humans. Also, your human keep talking about its arm, and we not want mad human in our town. But now Mother knows human is your servant, we let it come and go freely.
  • My Arm: T'anks, Mother. [player name] is helpful human.
    • I'm not his servant.
      • Player: I'm not his servant.
      • Mother: Humans are not welcome in Weiss. If you are not the servant of this troll, you should go away and never return.
      • Player: I see.
      • (Shows other options)
    • Why are you called Mother, Mother?
      • Player: Why are you called Mother, Mother?
      • Mother: A troll child is named after the first thing they try to eat. This is tradition of troll people. My full name is Mother's Left One.
      • My Arm: * cough *
      • (Shows other options)
    • Let's move on with the chat.
      • Player: Let's move on with the chat.
      • Mother: This here is Don't Know What, loyal bodyguard and chief sentry. He like a son to Mother.
      • Don't Know What: ...
      • Mother: This old troll is Odd Mushroom. He is big clever-clogs, and it makes him talk funny, but Mother puts up with it. Odd Mushroom invents stuff for Mother.
      • Odd Mushroom: It's a real pleasure to meet you, My Arm. And you too, [player name]. I look forward tremendously to working with you both.
      • Mother: And here come Mother's daughter, Snowflake.
      • Snowflake: Hello Father.
      • My Arm: Oh... [player name]... look!
      • Snowflake: Hello, visitor. I am Snowflake.
      • My Arm: My Arm very pleased to see Snowflake.
      • Snowflake: Your arm is pleased to see me?
      • My Arm: My Arm got named My Arm by my dad, after My Arm tried to nibble his arm... sorry, My Arm not want to bore you.
      • Snowflake: You are not boring - I like how My Arm talks. My father is Mother. He named me after a snowflake.
      • My Arm: Dat a pretty name. For a pretty troll. Maybe you get to know My Arm better soon?
      • Snowflake: I would like to spend more time with My Arm, yes.
      • Mother: Snowflake! We men got business to talk! Shut up and get out.
      • Snowflake: Sorry, Father.
      • My Arm: Aww...
      • Snowflake leaves.

Talking business with Mother[edit | edit source]

  • Odd Mushroom: You really shouldn't speak to her that way, Mother. It's incredibly rude.
  • Mother: You shut up too, or Mother break your clever-clogs head open an' see how smart your brain is when it outside your skull!
  • Mother: Snowflake got to respect boss, an' that is Mother. When Mother retire as boss, Don't Know What will marry Snowflake. Then he will be boss, an' Snowflake got to respect him.
  • Odd Mushroom: She doesn't want that, you know.
  • Mother: This your last warning - shut up! Weiss needs strong boss - that is how we survive. For now, Mother is strongest boss. Some day, Don't Know What will be strongest boss. Otherwise trolls die out.
  • Odd Mushroom: ...
  • Mother: So, arm troll, you come from Stronghold to share what you know. What you got?
  • Odd Mushroom: In return, we can teach you all about the special fires we've invented. They can be very useful.
  • My Arm: Well, My Arm know 'bout goutweed farming.
  • Odd Mushroom: That sounds jolly exciting!
  • Mother: Farming? That a stupid skill for a man-troll. Proper man-troll should use his muscles. You teach us something better than that, or you get out and not come back!
  • My Arm: Uh... [player name], what do we do now? If he kick us out, My Arm never gonna see Snowflake again. Help!
    • Tell him goutweed is delicious.
      • Player: Tell him goutweed is delicious.
      • My Arm: Yeah! Mother should try goutweed. It taste so good! Everything taste better with goutweed, an' My Arm know how to grow it.
      • Mother: Mother is not interested in eating stupid vegetables. Mother likes wolf flesh, freshly killed, with blood running down Mother's jaw.
      • Mother: Mother gets real warm fuzzy feeling inside, eating furry wolf.
      • Mother: You better have something else to offer, or you go home an' stop wasting Mother's time.
      • My Arm: [player name]?
      • (Shows other options)
    • Tell him how tough Stronghold trolls are.
      • Player: Tell him how tough Stronghold trolls are.
      • My Arm: Yeah, we really good at combat. Trolls near Stronghold, dey chuck rocks really hard. An' My Arm helped [player name] save da goutweed patch from big flappy bird thing!
      • Mother: Mother has trolls already who chuck rocks really hard. Also Mother has seen birds - they are not scary.
      • My Arm: Dis bird - it were really big though...
      • Mother: Mother is not impressed. Have Stronghold trolls nothing else to offer?
      • My Arm: What we do now, [player name]?
      • (Shows other options)
    • Tell him to show respect to his daughter.
      • Player: Tell him to show respect to his daughter.
      • My Arm: Yeah, My Arm not like how Mother talks to Snowflake.
      • Mother: Mother is boss; Snowflake will obey her father. Arm troll is making Mother angry. Now, what you teaching us?
      • My Arm: Dis not working, [player name]!
      • (Shows other options)
    • Tell him you love his daughter!
      • Player: Tell him you love his daughter!
      • My Arm: Really? If My Arm start talking' bout what My Arm want to do with his daughter, he probably gonna get angry or freaked out.
      • Player: I meant on a more emotional level...
      • Mother: Mother can hear you! It not matter. Mother's daughter, Snowflake, will marry Don't Know What. Then he can be boss when Mother retires.
      • Don't Know What: ...
      • Mother: Trolls need strong boss. Mother kept trolls alive through Mother's strength! Otherwise trolls would have died long ago. Once Mother retires, Don't Know What is strongest.
      • Mother: So Don't Know What will marry Snowflake and be boss of Weiss. No more talk on this! You arm troll, you teach us something good or go home!
      • (Shows other options)
    • Once all of the above four dialogue options have been chosen:
      • My Arm: Sorry, Mother, My Arm got nothing else. But My Arm not want to leave - can My Arm stay please?
      • Mother: Arm troll is useless. Get out of here!
      • (End of dialogue)
    • I'll get back to you in a bit.
      • Player: I'll get back to you in a bit.
      • (End of dialogue)

The Wise "Dead" Man[edit | edit source]

Talking to My Arm, Snowflake, or Odd Mushroom[edit | edit source]

  • My Arm: Oh, [player name], My Arm is being sent home. Stupid big Mother not interested in goutweed. My Arm would prefer to stay with Snowflake.
  • Snowflake: I wish My Arm did not have to leave.
    • Mother wasn't very nice to Snowflake in there.
      • Player: Mother wasn't very nice to Snowflake in there.
      • Snowflake: My father, Mother, did not like me talking to My Arm. Whoever marries me will rule Weiss after Father retires or dies, and Father wishes that to be Don't Know What, the biggest sentry.
      • My Arm: My Arm not happy 'bout dat.
      • Snowflake: My Arm is not as big as Don't Know What, and I think he is less strong too. Father would not approve of him as a suitor for me.
      • My Arm: Mother should mind own business, an' not tell Snowflake who to marry.
      • Snowflake: Father is... horrible to me.
      • (Shows other options)
    • Snowflake, you seemed to like My Arm.
      • Player: Snowflake, you seemed to like My Arm.
      • Snowflake: He is different from other man-trolls. I know already that I want My Arm by my side.
      • My Arm: My Arm want that too.
      • (Shows other options)
    • Odd Mushroom, why are you here with us?
      • Player: Odd Mushroom, why are you here with us?
      • Odd Mushroom: Oh, Mother's been annoying me for years. He doesn't care about anything except fighting. Whatever I invent for him, he ignores it completely if he can't use it in combat.
      • Odd Mushroom: That's why he dismissed My Arm's farming expertise too. He's really holding Weiss back. Trolls should aspire to be more than just lumbering monsters.
      • Odd Mushroom: Mother won't change himself, and none of us are strong enough to force him, especially with Don't Know What guarding him... but maybe My Arm can help.
      • Player: It sounds like you want My Arm to overthrow Mother for you.
      • Odd Mushroom: I deplore violence. No, I want Mother to let Snowflake marry My Arm, instead of marrying Don't Know What. Snowflake's smart, and she'll rule us better.
      • Odd Mushroom: But if she marries Don't Know What, he'll insist on ruling Weiss himself like Mother does - and he's no better than Mother. So I'd rather My Arm stayed here and married Snowflake.
      • Snowflake: The choice should be from my heart, not from anyone else - though I like this plan very much!
      • My Arm: My Arm like plan too. My Arm marry Snowflake, an' she become boss of town, an' My Arm teach town to farm goutweed. Yup, good plan.
      • Odd Mushroom: So we will need Mother to gain respect for My Arm, so that he'll consent to the marriage.
      • Snowflake: How can we get Father to respect My Arm? He likes Don't Know What because Don't Know What is strong, but My Arm is... different.
        • Can I kill Mother?
          • Player: Can I kill Mother? That usually solves problems in quests.
          • Snowflake: I would prefer you not to kill Father. He is cruel, but he is my blood.
          • Odd Mushroom: Let's not have any unnecessary killing.
          • (Shows other options)
        • Can My Arm fight Mother?
          • Player: Can My Arm fight Don't Know What?
          • My Arm: He look dumb, but he kinda big.
          • Snowflake: He is dumb, but he is big. I think this would not work.
          • (Shows other options)
        • Can My Arm fight Don't Know What?
          • Player: Can My Arm fight Mother?
          • My Arm: He really big though.
          • Snowflake: I do not think that would be wise, dear.
          • (Shows other options)
        • Does Mother respect anything except fighting?
          • Player: Does Mother respect anything except fighting?
          • Odd Mushroom: Mother's strength saved this tribe, in the past. That's how he became chief. He truly believes that if our chief is not physically strong, we will die out.
          • Odd Mushroom: You see, we have not always lived in Weiss. We used to live further south, near the dwarf town they call Keldagrim, until we were driven out...
          • Once upon a time in Keldagrim...'
          • A cutscene of the past plays, where the Black Guard were attacked by ice trolls. The Wise Young Man saves the day, driving the trolls away.
          • Odd Mushroom: That Wise Young Man drove us out into the barren icy mountains. Without Mother's strength to overcome obstacles and catch food, I believe we would have perished.
          • Player: Did you say the dwarves called that human the 'Wise Young Man'?
          • Odd Mushroom: Yes, that's right. They treated him as a great hero after he drove us out of our tunnels.
          • Player: I know that Wise Young Man you mentioned! I did a quest with him where we saved a fishing colony. He's the Wise Old Man now.
          • Snowflake: You know the mortal enemy of our people! What did you do in the fishing colony with him?
            • We killed a lot of trolls.
              • Player: We killed a lot of trolls.
              • Snowflake: Oh.
              • Odd Mushroom: I see.
              • Snowflake: Very well. That Wise Young Man killed many of our people, and I am disappointed that you worked with him, but I shall overlook it for My Arm.
              • My Arm: So if you all hate dis old man, how about My Arm kill him? Then Mother gonna really like My Arm! Old human sounds easy to kill.
              • (Same as below)
            • I did some fishing and fetched some stuff.
              • Player: I did some fishing and fetched some stuff.
              • Snowflake: Very well. That Wise Young Man killed many of our people, and I am glad that you are different from him.
              • My Arm: So if you all hate dis old man, how about My Arm kill him? Then Mother gonna really like My Arm! Old human sounds easy to kill.
              • Odd Mushroom: Yes! If you kill the human who drove us out from the Keldagrim tunnels, Mother will call you a hero and be pleased for you to marry Snowflake. Can you go and do it?
              • Player: No, My Arm can't kill the Wise Old Man! The Wise Old Man is far too powerful.
              • My Arm: Dat a shame. But he know you, [player name], an' you helped him in fishy colony place. Maybe you ask him a favour now?
              • Player: You're suggesting I ask him to let you kill him, just so that you can marry Snowflake?
              • My Arm: Please!
              • Odd Mushroom: Ah, no. He surely won't agree to die. But perhaps he can pretend he's dead, while My Arm tricks Mother into believing it. Can you ask him, [player name]?
              • Player: This is a very strange request!
              • Snowflake: Please ask him, [player name]! For me and My Arm!
        • I'll be back in a moment.
          • Player: I'll be back in a moment.
          • (End of dialogue)
    • Snowflake can leave with us.
      • Player: Snowflake can leave with us. Then she and My Arm can be together, in the Troll Stronghold.
      • Snowflake: Um... thank you for the offer, but...
      • Odd Mushroom: Ah. Mother is our chief, and as his daughter, Snowflake is the heir to the throne of Weiss. So Snowflake or her future husband will rule this town. My Arm may be a charming chappy...
      • My Arm: T'anks, mushroom troll.
      • Odd Mushroom: ... but Snowflake shouldn't be expected to run away from Weiss, abandoning what's hers. No, we should try to keep My Arm here.
      • (Shows other options)
    • I'll be back in a moment.
      • Player: I'll be back in a moment.
      • (End of dialogue)

Talking to any of them again[edit | edit source]

  • Snowflake: Have you asked the Wise Old Man to help us? We only need him to pretend to be dead, so My Arm can claim credit for killing him, and impress Father.
  • Odd Mushroom: Yes, that would impress Mother very much.
  • Player: I've not discussed it with him yet.
  • Snowflake: Please ask him, [player name]! For me and My Arm!
  • (End of dialogue)

Talking to the Wise Old Man[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: Greetings, [player name].
    • Ask about My Arm.
      • Wise Old Man: It's good of you to pop in, [player name]. What brings you to Draynor today?
        • My Arm needs your help.
          • Player: My Arm needs your help.
          • Wise Old Man: You should see a doctor about your arm.
          • Player: Not my arm, I mean My Arm.
          • Wise Old Man: ... you should see a doctor about your brain.
          • Player: That's not helping.
          • (Shows other options)
        • Can you pretend you're dead?
          • Player: Can you pretend you're dead?
          • Wise Old Man:
          • Player: That looked very strange.
          • Wise Old Man: You asked me to pretend I'm dead. That's what I imagine it would be like.
          • Player: Let me explain... A troll called My Arm needs to pretend he's killed you. This will impress his girlfriend's father, Mother.
          • Wise Old Man: His girlfriend's father, Mother?
          • Player: Yes. You drove Mother's tribe of trolls out of the dwarf tunnels near Keldagrim, long ago, and Mother's hated you ever since.
          • Wise Old Man: I remember driving trolls out of those tunnels, yes. So now there's a troll called My Arm who wants to pretend he's killed me in revenge, to impress his girlfriend's father, who is called Mother?
          • Player: That's right. If Mother thinks My Arm has killed you, he'll let My Arm marry his daughter, Snowflake.
          • Wise Old Man: Hmmmph. That's quite a big favour you're asking. I've spent much of my life saving people from monsters like that, not providing family mediation services for them.
            • You'll get rewarded if you help.
              • Player: You'll get rewarded if you help.
              • Wise Old Man: I don't think so, thank you. In my experience, a troll's idea of a quest reward is probably something useless like a pile of burnt meat.
              • (Shows other options)
            • You owe me a favour after the Fishing Colony quest.
              • Player: You owe me a favour after the Fishing Colony quest.
              • Wise Old Man: I suppose you did save my life from the Sea Troll Queen. That has to count for something...
              • Wise Old Man: Very well, I'll help. I'll need a cadava potion from the Varrock Apothecary, calibrated to suit my age. Also build me a proper mahogany coffin here - I wouldn't be seen dead in a cheap oak or teak one.
              • Player: Thank you. I'll try to get the potion and build you a coffin here.
              • (End of dialogue)
            • I'll think about it.
              • Player: I'll think about it.
              • (End of dialogue)
        • I'll be back.
          • Player: I'll be back.
          • (End of dialogue)
    • (Talk about something else)
      • Non-quest dialogue

Talking to the Wise Old Man again[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: Greetings, [player name].
    • Ask about My Arm.
      • Wise Old Man: I asked you to get me a cadava potion from the Varrock Apothecary, calibrated to suit my age, and to build me a mahogany coffin. How are you getting on?
      • Player: I've not built the coffin yet.
      • Wise Old Man: So I see. Make sure it's mahogany when you do - I wouldn't be seen dead in a cheap oak or teak one. You can build it here.
      • Player: I've not got the potion from the Apothecary yet.
      • Wise Old Man: Really? He's in Varrock, near the south-west corner of the city. He's a funny chap, but he knows his trade.
      • (End of dialogue)
    • (Talk about something else)
      • Non-quest dialogue

Talking to the Apothecary[edit | edit source]

  • Apothecary: I am the Apothecary. I brew potions. Do you need anything specific?
    • Can you make potions for me?
      • Non-quest dialogue
    • Talk about Making Friends with My Arm.
      • Player: Do you remember the Cadava potion you made for Juliet? Can you make another one for the Wise Old Man? He said you'd need to calibrate the dosage to suit his age.
      • Apothecary: I suppose he'd need a smaller dose than Juliet did, yes. She's a healthy young woman in the prime of her life, while he's been around for decades.
      • Apothecary: Well, I'm sure you remember the drill. I'll supply the wing of rat, tail of frog, ear of snake and horn of dog... and you need to bring me some Cadava berries.
      • If the player doesn't have Cadava berries:
        • Player: Oh yeah, cadava berries. I'll be back.
        • (End of dialogue)
      • If the player has Cadava berries already:
        • Player: Yup, I brought some of those.
        • Apothecary: That's very clever. I hope you've got a real feeling of pride and satisfaction from that.
        • You hand over the berries.
        • The Apothecary prepares the potion.
        • (End of dialogue)
    • Talk about something else.
      • Non-quest dialogue

Talking to the Wise Old Man after all is prepared[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: Greetings, [player name].
    • Ask about My Arm.
      • Wise Old Man: I asked you to get me a cadava potion from the Varrock Apothecary, calibrated to suit my age, and to build me a mahogany coffin. How are you getting on?
      • Player: Well, I've built the coffin.
      • Wise Old Man: Maybe I should have told you to make a gilded one, with a marble pedestal and crystal ornamentation. It would look more fitting... but no, this will do.
      • Player: I got the potion from the Apothecary.
      • Wise Old Man: Good. Hand it to me, then let us proceed with this charade.
      • You hand the potion to the Wise Old Man.
      • Wise Old Man: Yes, that looks about right. I wouldn't want to drink more than this, or I might risk an overdose. Well, here goes...
      • The Wise Old Man drinks the reduced cadava potion.
      • Wise Old Man: * BURP *
      • The Wise Old Man collapses...
      • ... and you help him into his coffin.
      • (End of dialogue)
    • (Talk about something else)
      • Non-quest dialogue

Impressing Mother[edit | edit source]

  • Player: The Wise Old Man has disguised himself as a corpse in a coffin to help you two.
  • My Arm: He very obliging, dis mortal enemy of Weiss. Must have been big favour he owed [player name]. Okieday, give coffin to My Arm, an' My Arm give him to Mother.
  • My Arm: Okieday, now My Arm has Wise Old Man in box! We go show Mother now. Maybe he like My Arm for killing big enemy of trolls.
  • You, My Arm, Snowflake, Odd Mushroom, and a "dead" Wise Old Man go see Mother.
  • My Arm: Here, Mother, look what My Arm done! My Arm done killed your old enemy! He kick you out of Keldagrim long back, now My Arm got him dead in gift-box!
  • Mother: My Arm did this? My Arm killed him?
  • Odd Mushroom: My Arm is clearly a great warrior, beyond the skills of any Weiss troll. We should welcome him into the tribe.
  • My Arm: Yeah, let My Arm stay in Weiss please. Also, can My Arm marry your daughter?
  • Mother: Huh. Mother must think about that. But look at this body here...
  • Mother: What kind of fight was this? Where is the blood? When Mother kills an enemy, there is blood. Much blood. Blood, brains, gut juices.
  • Mother: This old man could have died of old age in his sleep. How is that revenge for what he did to Mother? And to Mother's people?
  • Odd Mushroom: Come on, Mother. That man was our mortal enemy, and now My Arm's brought us his corpse. Accept My Arm as a friend and let's move on like civilised people.
  • Mother: You shut up, Odd Mushroom! Always talking about moving on, talking about civilising, talking about progress - what kind of troll are you?
  • Mother: You messed up Mother's daughter - she uses long words like you, talks about leading trolls into future.
  • Mother: She needs to marry proper troll, like Don't Know What, and remember how trolls are. Don't Know What can lead tribe for real.
  • Snowflake: Stop it, Father! You cannot tell me how to think, or how to live, or how to love. And I will be with My Arm.
  • Mother: I am Mother. I am your father, and you will obey me! This Arm troll brings nothing but trouble, and Mother does not trust him. In fact...
  • Wise Old Man: * snore *
  • Mother: What?
  • Odd Mushroom: Um... Don't worry, Mother, this is totally normal for a dead wizard. It's the magic escaping from the cadaver...
  • The unconscious Wise Old Man farts.
  • Wise Old Man: * parp *
  • Player: I don't remember Juliet doing that!
  • Mother: A TRICK!
  • Mother attacks the group, and imprisons you all.

Matricide[edit | edit source]

Talking to the Wise Old Man[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: Those salt formations are really quite remarkable. Your troll friends are having a private moment, so I'll study these while my head recovers from that potion.
  • (End of dialogue)

Talking to My Arm, Snowflake, or Odd Mushroom[edit | edit source]

  • Odd Mushroom: Snowflake, are you there? Reason tells me there is light in here, but my mind sees darkness.
  • Odd Mushroom: Snowflake?
  • Snowflake: I am here. Father did not hurt me much. Can you stand, Odd Mushroom?
  • Odd Mushroom: ... no, I don't think so. I am glad you are here with me, Snowflake. I must tell you something...
  • Odd Mushroom: I can smell that Mother has lit a Fire of Domination, up above. He never cared for most of my inventions, but he liked that one.
  • Odd Mushroom: That's the one that traps his enemies, and helps him beat them to a pulp. Definitely his favourite. He must intend to kill you all.
  • Wise Old Man: Fire of Domination?
  • Odd Mushroom: ... I suppose I have no secrets, now, even from the age- old enemy of Weiss. But you and I are thinkers, and in other circumstances we might have been friends.
  • Odd Mushroom: These salts in the mine - I invented ways to combine them, unlock their power. In a fire, they can work wonders.
  • Odd Mushroom: The Fire of Domination will block teleportation magicks, and it also aids Mother in a fight. It makes him incredibly dangerous.
  • Player: So we can't teleport out of here?
  • Snowflake: That hole leads down to the sea. But it's far too narrow for a troll to get through.
  • My Arm: My Arm not want to enter smelly hole!
  • Wise Old Man: I don't think I could get in there either, even if the smell weren't abhorrent. But [player name] might be able to fit.
    • I'll never leave you.
      • Player: I'll never leave you.
      • My Arm: You good friend, [player name].
      • Wise Old Man: Anyway, Odd Mushroom was telling us about the fires he'd invented.
      • Odd Mushroom: I wrote down my inventions, but many of my notes are lost. Mother only ever cared about the Fire of Domination, and fires he could use for combat.
      • Odd Mushroom: It can be hard to interest trolls in the delicate skill of Firemaking, sometimes. But perhaps Snowflake can find my lost notes, and carry on the science. She's far smarter than her father.
      • Odd Mushroom: But I never invented a fire that could stave off the eternal dark, and... I feel it coming.
      • Odd Mushroom: Snowflake, you must take over Weiss. You saw what Mother did to you, and to me, and to My Arm. Trolls will never be more than thuggish monsters as long as he rules.
      • My Arm: Mother did hit My Arm pretty hard.
      • Snowflake: I know what I must do. With My Arm at my side, I will avenge you. You were always more of a father to me than Mother ever could be.
      • Odd Mushroom: Thank you, child...
      • Odd Mushroom: ...
      • Snowflake: Goodbye.
      • (End of dialogue)
    • That'll be handy if I feel like escaping.
      • Player: That'll be handy if I feel like escaping.
      • My Arm: Aww.
      • Wise Old Man: Anyway, Odd Mushroom was telling us about the fires he'd invented.
      • (Same as above)

Grand Escape[edit | edit source]

  • Snowflake: My Arm, [player name], Old Man, we are going to get out of here, and punish my father for what he has done.
  • Wise Old Man: You have my support.
  • My Arm: And My Arm.
  • Wise Old Man: I hate to be indelicate, but... it may not be possible to overthrow Mother without killing him, especially if the fire makes him as dangerous as Odd Mushroom said.
  • Snowflake: Father killed Odd Mushroom. Odd Mushroom was like a father to me. Mother must pay the price. Also I think he really will kill us all.
  • Wise Old Man: [player name], you heard Odd Mushroom's warning. We can't use our teleport magicks, so the only escape - for you - is down the smelly hole.
  • Wise Old Man: Also, if we drop anything in here, I bet you're not going to be able to retrieve it. Items dropped in here will be lost forever.
  • The Wise Old Man is telling you that teleports are blocked, and there will be no way to retrieve your items if you die in here.
    • So I can't teleport, and I may lose stuff? Okay.
      • Player: So I can't teleport, and I may lose stuff? Okay.
      • My Arm: [player name] is brave human an' good friend for My Arm and Snowflake!
      • Snowflake: Old Man, do your magic and open that door!
      • The Wise Old Man casts a spell and busts the prison gate open.
      • Squirrel: Aargh - they're out!
    • I'm not ready to fight yet.
      • Player: I'm not ready to fight yet.
      • My Arm: Okieday, we hang around here until you are.

Mother knows best...[edit | edit source]

  • Mother: ... so you two kill the stupid Arm troll and the human it brought with it. Mother will sort Snowflake out permanently.
  • Odd Stone: Mother cannot mean to kill Snowflake, surely?
  • Mother: You want to do it yourself?
  • Odd Stone: Um... that was not what I meant.
  • Mother: Question Mother again, and it will be your blood that Mother drinks instead. Snowflake betrayed her father, and Mother does not forgive.
  • Butterfly: We are not happy about this.
  • Mother: Mother does not need you to be happy. Mother requires only that you obey, or die. We are trolls, not softy liberals like Snowflake.
  • Squirrel: OLD MAN IN THE DUNGEON!
  • Squirrel: OLD MAN IN THE DUNGEON! Thought you ought to know.
  • Mother: Of course he is in the dungeon. Mother put him there.
  • Squirrel: No, I mean he got out.
  • Both: Aaargh!

A New Leader[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: We got him!
  • My Arm:My Arm sorry 'bout your dad, Snowflake. But he kinda gonna kill us, anyway.
  • Snowflake: I am sorry too. Father was flawed, but he did much for our people, and he should have retired with honour long ago.
  • Snowflake: Old Man, [player name], thank you both for your help.
  • Wise Old Man: I'm not sure this was my proudest adventure, but you're welcome. I think I'll head off home to Draynor quite soon.
  • Snowflake: Very well. You will always be welcome here. Now, that is enough of the past. I feel the future beginning in Weiss... Let us summon my tribe.
  • Snowflakes summons the entire village to her.
  • Snowflake: Trolls of Weiss, I am Snowflake, daughter of Mother, my father. Mother is dead, and I claim the throne.
  • My Arm: Yup, My Arm helped Snowflake kill him.
  • Wise Old Man: Let's not emphasise that bit now, eh?
  • Snowflake: Does any troll here challenge me?
  • Odd Stone: Nope, we like Snowflake.
  • Goat Poo: Snowflake nicer than Mother. We okay with Snowflake.
  • Snowflake: Then the throne of Weiss is mine. I also call you to witness our marriage. [player name], please step forward.
  • The player steps forward.
  • Snowflake: I, Snowflake, give myself to My Arm. I take My Arm as my support and comforter. I will hold My Arm by my side for life.
  • Snowflake: My Arm is my friend forever. I will share the sorrows of life with My Arm, and I will share the joys of love with My Arm.
  • My Arm: My Arm will support Snowflake. My Arm will be at Snowflake's side. My Arm takes Snowflake by the hand for life.
  • My Arm: My Arm will be Snowflake's companion when sun shines an' life is bright. My Arm will be Snowflake's comfort in dark places.
  • Player: I pronounce you husband and wife!
  • Wise Old Man: Congratulations!
  • Snowflake: We now perform the ancient dance of love...
  • Snowflake and My Arm perform the ancient dance of love, while the player and the Wise Old Man dance together.

Wedding ceremony[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: Well, that was jolly charming, but I'm off now. Good bye.
  • My Arm: Sure would have been easier gettin' up to dis place if My Arm could do tellypot like dat!
  • Snowflake: [player name], we owe you so much, and we will thank you - but we still need one small favour first.
  • Player: You need... one small favour...? I've heard that said before.
  • My Arm: Yup, you good at dis stuff. My Arm been telling Snowflake how you fetched all kinda stuff to Stronghold for My Arm before.
  • Player: ... yes, as an experienced adventurer, I have indeed fetched stuff for people.
  • Snowflake: Good. Now please fetch us some goat dung. You should find some in the goat pen outside. Meanwhile I need to assign some of my trolls to different duties around Weiss.
    • What do you want with goat dung?
      • Player: What do you want with goat dung?
      • Snowflake: I think it will be useful to us. You will see why soon enough.
      • (End of dialogue)
    • Okay, I'll be back.
      • Player: Okay, I'll be back.
      • (End of dialogue)

Attempting to pick up goat dung without a bucket[edit | edit source]

  • Player: This is the kind of thing that's best carried in buckets.
  • (End of dialogue)

Talking to Snowflake again[edit | edit source]

  • Snowflake: Have you got the goat dung?
  • If the player doesn't have any goat dung:
    • Player: No, I've not got any goat dung yet.
    • Snowflake: You should find some in the goat pen outside. Meanwhile I need to assign some of my trolls to different duties around Weiss.
      • What do you want with goat dung?
        • ''(Same as above)
      • Okay, I'll be back.
        • ''(Same as above)
  • If the player has goat dung:
    • You proudly display your bucket of poo.
    • Snowflake: My Arm, what do you think, dear?
    • My Arm: My Arm t'inks dis gonna work, yeah!
    • Snowflake: Good! My Arm said you needed camel dung to grow goutweed. But goat dung is similar enough - I will make my trolls build farming patches from goat dung instead.
    • My Arm: She got trolls to use goat poo to make two herb patches! One for us to grow goutweed, an' one for you, 'cos you been good friend. We protect your stuff from disease.
    • Snowflake: I have searched through Odd Mushroom's possessions. Sadly much of his research has been lost. I have copied what I could find into a book for you.
    • Snowflake: He would have wanted you to have it - some of his inventions are not useful here, but you are a traveller and may find places to use them.
    • My Arm: You give it looksie now, an' see if you learn good stuff! Go on, Snowflake work hard on dis for you!
    • Snowflake gives you a tatty book of Odd Mushroom's writings.
    • (End of dialogue)

Talking to Snowflake before reading Odd Mushroom's notes[edit | edit source]

  • My Arm: You read book from Snowflake yet? She work hard on it for you.
  • Player: Not yet. I've got it here.
  • My Arm: Oh.
  • (End of dialogue)

Talking to Snowflake after reading Odd Mushroom's notes[edit | edit source]

  • Player: I read that book you gave me.
  • My Arm: Good! Now you know all Odd Mushroom's fire learnings, an' maybe they be useful to you.
  • Snowflake: When we have finished here, I would like you to try the Fire of Nourishment. Although Boulder made two herb patches as we told him, crops will not grow without such a fire to strengthen them.
  • My Arm: Herbie patches are outside Weiss, through gap in fence, west of town. One patch is for you, an' Boulder gonna protect it from disease for you.
  • Player: I'll bear it in mind. Through the gap in the fence, to the west of the town, you say?
  • Snowflake: That is right, [player name]. You can mine the salts in the cave below, next to the prison.
  • Snowflake: Now, let us thank you for bringing us together, for saving our lives and for marrying us...
  • Congratulations! Quest complete!